I make with the typing and the snark on the Interwebs. http://t.co/GzNxGCU3Hf & http://t.co/PpBHAqL7Mw. Every tweet should be taken extremely seriously.
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The night Kansas City baseball came back to life

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The night Kansas City baseball came back to life submitted by kcpistol
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thefakened
2466 days ago
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Kansas City, Missouri
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An Opportunity to Shout at Assholes

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Recently I wasn't paying attention and clicked something I shouldn't have. I got the Conduit virus on my Windows machine and it dug in deep.

It's a clever virus. Normal antivirus and malware products can't even see it. I lost a week of work. I've already warned my syndicate there might be a missing week of Dilbert unless I pull a rabbit out of the hat.

The virus generates a pop-up window pretending to be Microsoft. The message says you don't have an authentic version of Windows but if you call their number they will sell you one.

Before I continue, I did verify with Microsoft that the message is fake. Microsoft never tells you to call them. And they are aware of this scam. Their tech finally got it off my machine.

I called the scammers' phone number. They do an amazing imitation of a Microsoft call center. Apparently they studied Microsoft's actual processes and they trained good scam actors. I pretended to be an ignorant customer for a few minutes just to draw them out. A pleasant, Indian-sounding fellow patiently answered my questions.

Did I mention I was mad because I lost a week of productivity to these assholes?

I might have done some yelling. There might have been profanity. Okay, to be honest, I was foaming at the mouth and inventing insults that even impressed me. I screamed about his criminal ways, implored him to seek honest work or kill himself to make the world a better place. I told him to fuck himself seven different styles. And I was just getting started.

And he stayed on the phone, keeping in character to the scam, trying to calm me down like a real help desk person.

I even got him to put his "supervisor" on the line so I could insult his lineage, competence, and preferences for bestiality. He took it too. This was fun!

Then I told them they had 60 seconds to tell me how to remove their virus or I would publish their phone number in a natiional blog so everyone can call and insult them.

I started counting from 60 to zero, stopping occasionally to remind him how fucked he was. He sounded a bit worried but stayed in character. 

So here you go: The scammers are at 1-866-530-6599. Please call them and pretend to be a customer so you waste their time before you go off on them. Be creative. Be mean. And please yell. It's a free pass. The number will change soon, I assume, so act quickly.

Just tell them you got a pop-up message saying you don't have an authentic version of Windows 7 and you want to know what to do.

It's a lot of fun. Let me know how it goes.

I also thought it would be useful to publish the phone number so search engines can find it in case anyone in the future wants to verify it as a scam.

Scott
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thefakened
2757 days ago
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Don't know if this is genius or evil or both. But enjoy. Call and yell at these clowns.
Kansas City, Missouri
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Rainbow-Cake Recipe Inspires Comment Apocalypse

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Rainbow-Cake Recipe Inspires Comment Apocalypse

This is just a really special moment for humanity. We take you to the website for Fox 101.9, a radio station in Melbourne, Australia, where "Web Guy Josh" has published a peppy, harmless instructional post for the making of an "Amazing Rainbow Tie-Dye Number Surprise Cake."

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thefakened
2933 days ago
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This might be my favorite thing ever.
Kansas City, Missouri
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March Desktop

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thefakened
3042 days ago
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Kansas City, Missouri
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Sportscaster of the Day: Watch Dale Hansen's Great Commentary About Michael Sam. We Need More People Like This.

8 Comments and 17 Shares

Michael Sam would be the first openly gay player in the NFL; says he knows there will be problems. Dale Hansen is here to talk about celebrating our differences.

Submitted by: Unknown

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thefakened
3058 days ago
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Kansas City, Missouri
popular
3059 days ago
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7 public comments
lpaulkoch
3056 days ago
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Heck yeah.
Charlottesville, Virginia
sredfern
3058 days ago
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<3
Sydney Australia
GuuZ
3058 days ago
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'Nuff said. Epic rant is epic.
ChrisDL
3059 days ago
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"preach that shit reggie!"
New York
dreadhead
3059 days ago
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Well said.
Vancouver Island, Canada
satadru
3059 days ago
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Straight out of Newsroom.
New York, NY

February Desktop

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thefakened
3070 days ago
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Kansas City, Missouri
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